Monday, August 20, 2012

Death, Debris and Decay!


A 19 year old second-year engineering student died after he fell from a four-storey hostel! This could not have been an accident told his friends. He had committed suicide. 

Everyone in the city is very much shocked to hear the news of his suicide. After all, this isn't the first one in this year. There are four or five such suicides in the prestigious institutions of CEG, MIT and IIT in this year alone. This guy who died recently was supposed to be a bright student scoring 1160 marks in his plus two board examinations with a cut off of 198 out of 200. The situation is the same in all the four other cases. The students who committed suicide had been the pride of their schools. These were the sources of inspiration to their juniors in school whose ultimate ambition was to get into the esteemed institutions across the state. Their parents had pinned their hope on them that their son/daughter would make prosperity in their lives. Now the hopes of every single one of them is been shattered into pieces. 





What can be the potential reasons of the suicides of these younger minds? They are supposed to be the most brilliant students. They belonged to the creamy layer of the state. They should have certainly worked hard in their school to get into these places. The minds of these students should have been that of a genius. But why did they turn into cowards and weak-minded? 



1) Adaptation: The students who come from rural areas or the districts down south find it very difficult to adapt to the new environment. The metropolitan life is certainly very much difficult to live when compared to the places they are from. The vast place, the huge population, the complex transport system, the fashion, the standard of living, the type of food, the competition and what not! The very first thought that encounters a guy's mind, who visits the metropolitan city, is how difficult it is to lead one's life in here?! Only a few overcome all these difficulties and survive. 

2) Longing for affection and care: It is evident that almost all who had committed suicide were the hostelites. There must have been people in their place who had taken very good care of them. They must have shown them, all their love and affection. They would not have let them do their works and instead they would have done every thing for them right from polishing their shoes to combing their hair. I don't accuse parents but that they should have let them do their work so that they could get adapted to the situation where there could be no care or affection. 

3) Lack of responsibility: Responsible students never get these cowardly thoughts. If you had been brought up responsible, you would certainly be responsible now. The parents should make their children aware of their responsibilities in the family and the society. On the contrary they always hide their difficulties from their progeny thinking that they need not know difficulties at that age. This never helps them. If they had known your difficulties, they would not have been irresponsible and certainly would not have taken this decision. Be responsible, friends. Think about your parents every time you feel depressed. The so-called difficulties you face are next to nothing when compared to your parents' sufferings. 

4) Fear about the future: If you are not living properly in the present, you don't have the rights to fear about your future. It is rightly said "Yesterday is a history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift. And that is why we call it the present." Live in your present. Put the maximum effort in what you do and don't worry about the result. 

5) Ignorance and Insult: This is not the fault of those students. This is our fault, my friends. A guy can bear insults but not ignorance. Think about this. They come from different sections of the society to a new surrounding. They are already facing many a problems. We must talk to them, help and make them feel at home. How many of us do that? We see them as a Martian. We should not ignore them just because they are not from our sect. We form our own groups but we don't consider to include them. They are separated and left alone. That is terrible.  

6) Pressure: You are pressurized. Aren't you? There are always the desperate parents who tell their children this. “You have got school first in your plus two yet you have an arrears now. How could we walk with our heads high? You are a disgrace to the family!” Dear parents, remember that this same child made you proud a few years back. The school and the college aren't the same. They are entirely different. It isn't a must that those who have topped their school should maintain that in college. The education in school is reading and in contrast the education in college is learning and not reading. First try to understand the situation in which your child lives. Don’t  induce a peer pressure. 

7) Lack of support: Now-a-days it has become the style of a professor to quote this especially when a student couldn't answer his/her question. “You should have mugged up the contents of the book and cleared the paper without understanding. You may have got 200 cut off in your board exams but it’s difficult to survive here. Remember those times when the students were so smart and so knowledgeable.” If you learned people do this, how will the parents understand? A good teacher is one who understands the student well and helps him in his life and leads him through his difficulties. Not a guy like you! You are only a disgrace and he is not! 

8) Lack of belief: Have confidence in you. When you don’t believe your own potential, how can you expect others to believe yours and help you? What matters if you have arrears when you excel in another field? Life isn't only about studies. There are several things other than that. There is a whole new thing waiting for you outside the premises of your college. If you don’t fight against these difficulties and come up, how will you see those splendid things waiting for you? Believe in your potential and that will change these things! 

9) Adolescence: This is the age of adolescence. You are prone to love, lust and indulge in smoking and drinking. There is no love on this earth equal to your mother’s. There is no care equal to the God’s on this earth. There is no affection on this earth as your father’s. Yet you choose to die just because a girl/boy rejected you? This is the sense of insanity. Think high of you. If you are responsible, you will think there are much more important now than this. If you scold me that I don’t know the feeling, well, yeah. I don’t know! I may not know. But I am sure that your love can wait till you get a job and get stable in your life. What about your parents and others who believe that you will improve the condition of your family? What about the people who have hope in you that you will take care of them in their final days? Don’t lose that! If your dad had this practice of smoking or drinking, what would have happened to you? Will you be in this place at this time? That's a doubt! Even if you are here, you must have undergone a great stress to get into this institution. They have sacrificed a lot for you. And it is a MUST that you must take care of them. 

Life isn't something given by God for you just to end it because you are in distress. It is something more that that. Here is a famous dialogue from the film called “Rocky Balboa” released in 2006. 

I'd hold you up to say to your mother, "this kid's gonna be the best kid in the world. This kid's going to be somebody better than anybody I ever knew." And you grew up good and wonderful. It was great just watching you, every day was like a privilege. Then the time comes for you to be your own man and take on the world, and you did. But somewhere along the line, you changed. You stopped being you. You let people stick a finger in your face and tell you you're no good. And when things got hard, you started looking for something to blame, like a big shadow. Let me tell you something you already know. The world isn't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it isn't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you aren't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that isn't you! You're better than that! I'm always gonna love you no matter what. No matter what happens. You're my son and you're my blood. You're the best thing in my life. But until you start believing in yourself, you ain't gonna have a life. 





அரிது அரிது மானிடராய் பிறத்தல் அரிது 
அதனினும் அரிது கூன், குருடு செவிடு இன்றி பிறத்தல் அரிது! 
(Its rare to be born as humans and it's even rare to be born without any impairment!) 

This is a famous verse of Avvaiyar. Life is a gift for us. Please don’t waste it for mean reasons!

P.S: A few days back, a guy from a big institution threw himself before the train because he couldn't get to the second round of an interview. 

18 comments:

  1. Man totally agreed!
    You've mentioned each and every point so thoroughly and nicely summed it up!
    Let this post spread,hope some wise ones may learn to live as it comes..
    A good post sir!

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    1. Thanks Kinara :) I have put this post only for the awakening of those! Everyone must know that their life is precious :)

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  2. Gr8 job.I would mainly stress on the fact that students are insulted,for their lack of knowledge,not by their frnds,but by their profs!!!!Honestly,how many of us havent faced those insults in these 2 yrs?!?!?!

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    1. Thanks :) Yeah! Exactly the stress factor increases to a higher value because of that! Teachers should help students through their difficulties and shoul not insult them! They exactly do the opposite! :@

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  3. Excellent post ! Good analysis of possible causes !

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    1. Thanks Jaish for reading and commenting :) Your posts are really worthy :)

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  4. A very strong post! Hope people with wrong ideas change after reading this! Good work.

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    1. Thanks di :) Yeah! They must change! Keep viewing :)

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  5. Another reason to blame for the suicides is the quality of education that some of these students are getting in their 12th standard. The fact is that they study for marks and not understanding... and with teachers telling the students "study this, don't study that..." at the end of the day this doesn't help at all. These people aren't able to cope up once they enter college... and hence the suicide rates. The fact that the teachers here don't help at all just adds fuel to the fire. It's a sad reality, really.

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    1. Exactly! One of the critic to be analysed! The difference in the quality of education between school and college level frightens the student! There must be a change in our system and that would really help the students and make them really smart and bright! Thanks Guru for reading and commenting :)

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  6. well analyzed and written! also hats-off for choosing this as a topic for one of your posts!definitely an eye-opener for most

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    1. :)thanks Shruthi :) Yeah I have written this in hope that at least some might change their view seeing this! keep supporting :)

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  7. Exactly said...!! Present generation is not internally strong and our surroundings should definitely be blamed for this..! It cannot be changed in one single day but it needs to be inculcated from childhood and I believe if every parent and teacher changes their attitude, surely we can create an revolution..!!

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    1. I too hope at least some will realise after reading this post! Thank you :)

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  8. This is some awesome analysis, Hari. Recently, I came across some statistics and it showed the suicide rate among adolescents in Tamil Nadu is very high.
    Wish we the society, the parents, the schools, the friends help stop people from taking such extreme actions.

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    1. Thank you so much :) No need of statistics, but I myself witness these suicides once in a day somewhere.. Hear it through someone... such a sad situation... We all become a reason in one way or the other for this problem and hope let us hear our friends who are in distress and help prevent this...

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Time to hear yours, please

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